a. why? b. because I wanted

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Jim: Knock, knock? Tom: Who's there? Jim: You're. Tom: You're who? Jim: You're a retard. ............................ Tom: You're mean, like a hobbit...

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What do you call a dog that's half poodle, half bulldog? A dog.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Get out of the bathroom Get out of the bathroom who? No, your in the bathroom

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Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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Why does a snake have eyes? To see!

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Q: How do you stop a Mexican tank? A: Ask politely.

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whats dirtier than lady gaga's penis in justin bieber's vagina? nothing.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Why doesnt the ladder work? A ladder is an inaminent object therefore imcapable of having a job.

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What do you call a man or woman who has sex, records it on video, and sells the recordings for money? A porn star.

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'I had a surprise test today.' 'What happened?' 'I was really surprised.'

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What's bigger than the Loch Ness Monster? Loch Ness.

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Whats black and smells like white paint? A) Black paint!

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whats really hot the sun

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Your mom is so ugly she plans on using you college funds for getting plastic surgery

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what long hard and in a tight hole? a penis in a vagina

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Whats worse then being raped? Nothing it will ruin your life.

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Her lips aren't proportionally fit to her face

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The mailman saw little Johnny sitting on the side of the street with an old coffee can Mailman: What do you have in that can there? Johnny: dog shit Mailman: what the fuck

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how do you make a dog roll over you kill it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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