A christian was diagnosed with cancer. He refused chemo and prayed to god. Eventually, he died.

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5

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What do you call a bunch of Mexicans on fire? Jumping Beans.

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What did Connor say to the fat man? Dude ur extremely fat.

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Yo momma so hot she won a beauty contest and was later shot and killed by the jealous losers

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What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

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asparagus

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

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How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except it didn't work for the boy with ice cream.

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Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

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Why didn't the little boy get to go to the movies on his birthday? He was both blind and deaf, completely defeating the purpose of going to the movies.

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Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

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Why did the vegetarian lose her foot? Diabetes.

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Jesse ziggenfat hates his life. He's really obese. Just like his mom...and his sister...and his brother.....and his dad.... And his dog? Bacon?

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How do dinosaurs pay their bills? They don’t, dinosaurs don’t have a capital system.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs being pulled behind a boat? A: Skip.

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What do you call a whore? Kelsey cook duh

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black people

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What is worse then dropping the soap? Not being able to pick it back up.

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How do you upset a builder? Kill all his family.

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i'm not gay

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what did the pregnant black woman say to the white man I'm pregnant

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A man walks into a bar, and orders a drink. He reaches into his back pocket, but cannot find his wallet. The man was pick pocketed by a skilled thief on his walk to the bar. The man quickly makes calls to cancel his credit cards and minimize the financial loss.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your boobss.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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