What do a grape and a plane have in common? They both have wings... except for the grape!

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The mighty wizard said "come fourth cowardly lion and receive bravery" but he came fifth and got absolutely nothing. Todo came fourth and got the bravery.

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Ian is cutie!!!!!;)

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A muslim bought tickets for a 3pm flight. It was 11am, so in the mean time, he went to a bar to loosen up. His bomb vest accidently went off early, killing everyone in the bar. The flight arrived on-time in San Fransico.

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Q: What do you give a woman with everything? Nothing. You own nothing to give.

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What Do You Call A Swimming Banana.. Nothing Bananas Are Inanimate Objects Therefore It Would Be Impossible For It Swim

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You poker face.

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt Getting stabbed.

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How do you prevent aids? Nail an orphan to your genitals before sex.

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yo mamas so ugly she makes blind children cry

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How many people does it take to kill the president? A number

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So did you hear what happened to the deaf guy? He didn't either

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

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Once, one man had a horse. And the horse had nothing against it

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Why is Alan in the hospital? Because he got cancer.

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Why cant Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish.

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What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

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Q: Little black thing with a little red thing on it. What is it?! A: Ant with a broken nose...

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Q:what do you call a black guy with a gun A:racial equality in our nations armed forces

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What did the homeless man without legs and arms, get for Christmas? ... Cancer

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Hey i just F****d you, And this is crazy, Delete my number, And keep the baby!

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That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

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whats worse than stubbing your toe? getting a vanarial disease and going insane

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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