whats the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

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You: Mike and Steve were playing chess, who won? Them: Mike You: no, it was steve

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How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

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What happened to the man that jump out of the airplane with no parachute? He landed on a baby and both died almost instantly. The authorities were called and they took care of the situation flawlessly.

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Homework.

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Why is ya dad ya dad? ........ because of ya cousin

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What's red and hurts your teeth? A brick.

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

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Knock knock. Death.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzie.

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baby seal walks into a bar

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A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

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What do you do when you see a black child riding a bike? Think to yourself, "Wow you just don't see many kids riding bikes anymore because there too busy playing video games in their basement."

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What's round and red? A red and round solid.

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"And i look to myself what the hell happened to our world..."

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21

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What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its just a bulge I swear its not a bomb

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How did the fat man die? Type 2 diabetes

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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Why did the dog run away from home? Because dogs are absent-minded and they don't know any better.

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Q: What is the likely outcome of anyone who watches 'WWE'? A: They will lose their virginity to a hooker.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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