Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

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my computer crashed because i never quit... out of anything

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Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

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K

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what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

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Dude? What. Dude? What! Wheres my car?

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k

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why was the black man in jail? He stole food from a store due to the fact that his family was very poor and could not afford to fend for themselves.

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Chuck norris walked into a bar. He went up to the bartender, clenched his fists and gave him some money

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want to hear a bird joke? no well, this is hawkward

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Im going to france... Why To get french fries! Have fun Im back with a $10000bill to pay Wheres the fries Shit

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Why did John scream when he came in to his bedroom? He stepped on a nail

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? 124

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Asians

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What do you eat when you watch porn? Corn

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roses are red violets are blue last time I saw u were in a zoo don't worry ill be there to not in a cage but laughing at u

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What's worse than rush hour traffic? Your childhood friend, Ricky, was just brutally killed by a street cleaner

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Why was the chimp late for his flight? Because chimps arent allowed through airport security.

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for nothing? black

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OBAMA

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How many Germans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 5.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad. salads can't fly planes.

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Why did the Israeli military stop the helicopter raids to Gaza? They didn't. They continue them until there is nobody left.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops