A guy is walking on the beach one day when he stubs his toe on something shiny. Digging in the sand he finds an old, tarnished lamp. He takes it home and liberally applies polish, then puts it on his mantlepiece, it completes the look he was going for in his room and he feels like all his wishes have come true. His wife dies in a car accident later that day.

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who eats pencils asians

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what's worse then being dumped? NOTHING

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What is underneath Chuck Norris' Beard? His Chin

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour

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Whats brown and sticky? A peice of poo

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Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? A: The wheel chair.

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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I'm a like whore

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What do you call nacho cheese? Stolen.

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That awkward moment when the moment isn't awkward.

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Why are these jokes so funny? Because they're NOT!

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A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

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larry clark i smoke pot and im gay its phillup

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The Sentence Below is True The Sentence Above is False

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Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

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Yo momma so thin, she admitted herself into an in-patient counseling center for anorexic and bulimic patients.

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Ask me if I am a truck. Are you a truck? No.

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Why does the Anti-Joke site suck? Because it's not funny.

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What do you call 2 tigers, a zebra, and a walrus? A small zoo full of 4 animals

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Why do black people like fried chicken? There's cocaine inside.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. I didn't ask him.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a jar filled with money. He asks the bartender, "What`s all this money for?" The bartender replies, "It`s Breast Cancer Awareness month and we are collecting donations." The man puts in $5, and continues on with his night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops