why did the baby die because it was diagnosed with lukimia

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats Mary short for? Shes got no legs

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the sound of victory? The sound of a knife cutting into a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

*Ring* *Ring* Bartender : Hello? Stranger:Is Mike Hunt their? Bartender: Mike Hunt! Is Mike Hunt here?! Mike Hunt: Oh thank god! I've been anticipating this phone call for a while now! I've been stranded here for hours and my wife's been killed and the killer is still out there!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: How do you stop a Mexican tank? A: Ask politely.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the black man get on his SAT's? -Barbecue sauce

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Yo mama is so fat, she had to get liposuction.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

motley crew

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what do u call a gay bird a gaybird

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why'd the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens are raised on farms, which are away from society. They are taken care of in pens, and have no way of escaping. Therefore it couldn't have crossed any roads.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the black man running away from the cops? He was running a relay race.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Methodist minister were playing golf. The Priest won by one stroke.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock *no answer* Knock Knock *Genevieve enters the house with curiosity and is later charged with Breaking and Entering*

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats worst than the holocaust? the holocaust times 2

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A bad decision because soccer is in their blood

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What three letters alter boys into men and girls into women? The letter containing their bank card, the letter containing their national insurance card and the letter accepting them into a job or higher education placement.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

There's two men on a subway. One says "Hey, that's my sandwich.".

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops