what did the 3 hispanic men say to the fat guy? you're in our seats

Why did the dog's chin get all scraped up? He didn't have any front legs.

What's 9+10=? 19

Q:what do you call a black guy with a gun A:racial equality in our nations armed forces

Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

A bear walks into a bar. Four people were taken to the hospital and there was one fatality.

How do you put 100 babys in a bucket? A blender

heres a great game to play... DEATH TO BABIES!

What did the baby with Downs syndrome say to the baby with cancer? Nothing, baby's can't talk

How did the man with no arm and no legs get to the store? Well he certainly didn't walk.

knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

This is you cat This is just cat This is wasted cat This is your cat This is time cat This is reading cat This is this cat Now read the third word of every sentance

Why did the orange drive the tractor? Because he always wanted to go to the moon.

Ross Tumilty is gay 8===D

A priest, a rabbi, and a whale sit down at a bar. The priest says to the bartender, "Jesus Christ is our savior." The rabbi responds, "No. Our savior has not yet been born." To which the whale adds, "MMMUUURRRAAAAAAOOOUUU!!!"

What do you call a man who has committed more than 10 crimes? Whatever his name happens to be.

What did the person say to the person about to run into the tree? Watch out for that tree!

What is the difference between an Irishman and a plank of wood? Almost everything, including anatomy, chemical make up, mass etc

roses are red, violets are red, my garden is on fire

Why was the crocodile depressed? It wasn't; given the primitive anatomy of the reptilian brain, modern biopsychoneurological evidence suggests that reptiles feel only basic emotions such as fear or anger.

What's funnier than Man on Woman domestic abuse? Nothing.

A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

What's worse than being killed? Reading these jokes.

What happened when a terrorist puts a bomb in a hospital? Everyone dies cause it was a hospital for crippled people

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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