Roses are red, violets are blue, cheeseburger.

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There are two horses in a stable. They were just talking about the weather and other normal things. Suddenly, the dog ran in. "HELP, HELP!!!" The dog screamed. Farmer Brandy got stuck in the tractor!!! The horses said, "HOLY SHIT........... A TALKING DOG!!!!"

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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Anti-Jokes is addicting, you know what else is addicting? Heroine.

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The funniest tragedy in his young life...wasn't funny.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, get in my bed so i can fu** you!

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Why did the girl hang up on her boyfriend? Because the roof collapsed on her.

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Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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what was sad about six black guys driving off a cliff in a cadallac? They were my friends

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How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

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why was the man gay? because he likes men.

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Q: why do the Toronto maple leafs suck? A: they dont they r in seventh place biotch!

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What do you call two dead blondes? A terrible day for their families and for many more to come

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how do you make a dead baby float? take your foot off its head.

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austins gay lolololol

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Nipples+poop= good stuff. Hellllll yeaaahhhh

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What is the difference between assault and aggravated assault? Aggravated assault is aggravated, whereas assault is aggravated.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

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Whats black, blue, and doesn't like sex? The little boy in my trunk.

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why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

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This is "Eliza" holy shit! I almost gave up and went to a party assuming you guys had simply skipped the reply. Please tell me nothing of this is written in code, because I have no fucking idea how to decipher it... ...To think that so few consider Nero a hero for all that he has done, and so many have come to hate him and still follow his advice basically abusing him. I told my sister to use mom`s cellphone to call and warn as many as possible, telling them to spread the word, is Nero7 Going to make it? He mentioned a barfight starting over nothing during new years eve. I know that some of the members where planning to use his own teachings in order to overthrow him, I warned him but he was fully aware already but did nothing for some reason. Yet none of them have the assets to do anything like this... Should I start calling all those members that left during Nero7`s "sudden paranoia period?" Many of them have political authority and can be of help if we can somehow convince them. Respond Asap, and if Nero7 is in a public hospital, then get him the hell out of there, he is an exposed target for anyone, if he gets killed, ill fucking kill you you hear me!

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Why i didn't bought the "Anti Joke The Book".. Because the joke in it aren't funny..

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knock knock hows there sorry but i was to lazy to think of an ending

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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