Imagine: You are trapped in a prizon cell with no doors, no windows, no furniture and completely sealed in with nothing. What do you do? Stop imagining!

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poop

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Whats big, ugly, and sucks? Death.

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How do you get twenty black men in a tiny car? Saw them into pieces.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game.

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Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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What do you call a black priest? HOLY SHIT!!!

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A blind man walks into a bar and a table and a lady....

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What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

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Do you know what big feet mean. Big socks

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why did the small child drop his icecream? he was hit by a bus

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How do you insult a Canadian? You just swear at them and hope for the best.

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One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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How do you make a business man cry? Hit him in the face with a brick

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A man is cheating on his wife. His wife finds out and is instantly distressed and begins to cry.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? How dumb are you?

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k

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Jesus was nailed to the cross by Roman guards... His disciples were kept behind a line of guards and they could not hear Jesus speak. They can see he was saying something, so they had to get closer to hear what he was saying. John dodged a guard and ran towards Jesus, but a guard cut his leg off with a sword... Peter ran for it and got past John but another guard cut off one of his legs... Matthew saw this opportunity to dodge both guards and jets past both John and Peter and gets to the foot of the cross... Jesus looks down at Matthew and says, "Matthew.... I can see your house from here!"

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What's worse then being HIV positive? Catching the cold the next day.

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What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

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Two Jews are on their way to the giant oven, one looks back at the other in fear and says, "I think I overcooked the lasagna."

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What's worse than getting a detention? Slavery...just kidding that was a good thing!

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops