How did Bob fall off the swing? He had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? He had no arms. What did Bob get for Christmas? Cancer.

What do you get when you cross a donkey and a horse? a mule

TJE ELIAS, LÄGET?

Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Sure, I like all kinds of Juice. -Apple Jews -Grape Jews -Orange Jews The list goes on,,,

what did the ugly girl get on valentines? A paper bag

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having sexaual relations with your own mother.

what is the difference between a black person and a little boy with autism .... the boy with autism is smarter with more education than the black person

I lost my tractor.

What do you call a baby who was raped and murdered? Funny

What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

After dinner, my girlfriend told me that we should go to my room to play with eachother's toys. It was very fun, I've always enjoyed the plastic dinosaur she decided to bring over.

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

Miranda Cosgrove's singing career. ......Thats it. Thats the joke.

Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

Anti-Jokes is addicting, you know what else is addicting? Heroine.

What do you call a cow in the grass... A cow in the grass... Dumbas*

"Roses are Red" "Violets are Blue" That's what they say, But it isn't true. Violets are violet, Now stop sniffing glue!

Why did the elephant cross the road? It's an elephant. Who's going to stop it?

What is big, red, and beats rocks? A big, red, rock beater.

"I love you, you love me" And you didn't just read that; you sang it.

Roses are red, violets are blue, cheeseburger.

There are two horses in a stable. They were just talking about the weather and other normal things. Suddenly, the dog ran in. "HELP, HELP!!!" The dog screamed. Farmer Brandy got stuck in the tractor!!! The horses said, "HOLY SHIT........... A TALKING DOG!!!!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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