why did santa fall of the roof? Because the roof was slippery from the ice.

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knock,knock who's there? the postman didn't answer as he is deaf

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Yeah, just went for more ice, its hot as hell here, and yeah its the weather, I dont mind you using valium, is that the same as Xanax? My mum uses it sometimes, she is afraid of heights and well, has to fly a lot so its complicated, if you dont mind, I have always wanted to know more about you so shall we?

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How did Suzy die She choked on a Pick-Up Truck

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What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from camp.

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Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, Everything's Grey, I am a Dog.

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What do you call 200 black men jumping from a plane? Night

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What do you call a black man riding a bike? Alan. He's studying environmental engineering at NYU.

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What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

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Q: What did the man say before he was stabbed? A: "What are you gonna do, stab me?"

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *goes crazy and shoots himself*

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ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because it was holding hands with the monkey. Why were the monkey and the sloth holding hands? Because they were best friends.

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what did the boy from a computer recycling unit in china get on his birthday? Pancreatic cancer.

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What did the muffin say to the oven? Obviously nothing since neither one can talk.

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A jew go out of a bar

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whats white and sticking?... glue, you dirty bastard

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What's the difference between babies and butter? You can't pitchfork butter.

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an amosh person used an electrical appliance

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Whats worse than getting mugged? Getting mugged twice.

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Whats gay and smells like straight girls? An envelope.

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Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

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Todays word of the day, is "legs" lets head back to your place and spread the word....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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