Why did a lady get in a car crash? Because woman don't drive, they stay in the kitchen!

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How did the asian woman's car get totaled She was hit by a drunk driver

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roses are red violets are black i hope your chest is not as flat as your back.

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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"My foot is killing me" "no, actually it's that noose around your neck"

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me:I will trade you 5 dollars for 10 dollars blond: Okay! me: ...

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Question: How many rocks does it take to make a pancake? Answer: Tree.

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Why couldn't little Johnny drive the tractor? Because he had no arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because he was a potato

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What did Michael Jackson think when someone threw a tomato off his head? The same as he was thinking before it happened, because everything that goes through Michael Jackson's head is pornographic images.

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the appropriate amount of medicine as directed by her doctor for her condition.

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Knock knock Violets are blue Helen Keller The Holocaust.

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Knock knock What

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Why did the chicken cross the road... He wanted to get away from all those jerks who kept asking him why he made the decisions that he did. he later committed suicide...

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A black man picks up his phone and calls his wife and finds out he had no wife

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What did the black cat say to the tabby cat?? Meow

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

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Q: What came first, the chicken or the egg? A: The egg, dinosaurs reproduced long before chickens existed.

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what do rappers cover? ->CANDY CREDITS: ANUJ NARAYAN VARMA from Leland high school

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What did the downs syndrome say when he walked into the bar? 'nbgzsbjndjgtbnsuzhvcghvdhjdtv.' He has downs syndrome

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when does the phrase "time heals all wounds" not apply? to people with fatal wounds.

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My friends are like trampolines I have none

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Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? the black baby is black

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What did the man do with his bread He ate it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops