What did chuck Norris say to the docter Nothing he never has to go to a hospital

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A man walks into a bar. Now I have to kill you, because that's top secret information.

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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how do you fall off a building? you trip.

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What's grey and looks good on policemen? your mom.

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How do you spell Madeleine Mccann? I A N

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A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

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A man eats a piece of fried chicken A chicken that was days before retirement and had a pregnant wife and two children to look after

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I'm going to Re-write History... History

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How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

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A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

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how do you make a dog roll over you kill it

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what did the cheese say to the wall? nothing cheese can't talk.

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Don't go to the last anti-joke page, they're all terrible or repeated I hope this isn't one of them

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Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

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How did Bob fall off the swing? He had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? He had no arms. What did Bob get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Roses are red my name is Dave this poem makes no sense, micorwave

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I scream! You scream! - You've Just Been Rapped

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robin, get in the car.

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what did the ugly girl get on valentines? A paper bag

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Yo mamma's handwriting is so bad that its barely legible to most people!

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What part of NO can't you understand? The part where you pronounce the 'N'.

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Abe Lincoln, George Washington, George Bush and Barack Obama are sitting at a table at a bar. They all realize that none of them know each other, wonder when in time they are, have mental breakdowns, and run screaming into the night.

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why did the cookie go to the docter he felt crumpie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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