WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

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Yo momma is so fat that you should really take her to the hospital, i've become very concerned for her.

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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If pinocchio said "my nose is going to grow", what would happen?

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solve y = [1 arctan (x)] / [2-3 arctan (x)]

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Barack Obama

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Why was the boy with a green and blue collared shirt holding a bottle of rice dead at the bottom of the sea? Because he was pushed of a boat and couldn't swim.

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Charlie Sheen walks into a bar, he relapses.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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The battle of Troy lasted approximatley nine years.

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a dyslexic Satan worshiper sold his soul to Santa

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What do yo call four Jewish guys sitting around doing nothing? The Sabbath Day

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what r the two best ways to describe a guy whose eating a bannana while peeing, time conservative and a multitasker

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why was the man masturbating? his wife needed a break

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Q: Has your ear operation had success? A: Hotdog with chili.

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whats short and has spots? A mouse with the chicken pocks.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worse than that? Dying. What's worse than dying? Finding three worms in your apple.

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Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

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what did the crippled boy get for christmas? cancer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its just a bulge I swear its not a bomb

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Did you hear about the man who didn't get a burger with his meal?! Yes he is doing quite well on his diet don't you agree?

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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What did the little girl do with her puppy? She killed it.

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Yo mama is so fat, she is thinking of going on a diet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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