What's funnier than 24? 25.

*knock knock "there's a door bell"

Roses are brown, violets are brown, who is s***ing in my garden?

knock knock who's there? a murder who? a murder who kills you and your family.

Dad they tell me I am homosexual at school, what does it mean? Ask your boyfriend.

Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

What happened when the turtle rolled over on his back? It proceeded to die because it couldnt find a way to roll over. An African tribe then decided to make the recently decised turtle into a delicious soup that lasted him and his family three days.

Contrary to popular belief- And this just in. My daughter has breast cancer.

how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

What did mr. Mackey say to his class. It's easy mkay

What's black, white, and red all over? White on black homicide.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an apple and slicing your mouth on a razorblade

What did the black man, chinese man, and mexican man all have in common? They all happened to enjoy cantaloupe.

why did the kid get a bad grade he didnt study

Yo mama's so fat that when she was diagnosed with a flesh eating disease she was given 10 years to live.

the chicken whent boomand then died

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock who's there? the chicken

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was an animal of minimal intelligence and didn't know of the underlining risks involved in crossing a high speed passage for cars and other road baring vehicles, the presence of the chicken in the road also prompted further danger for the drivers involved in the situation. This resulted ultimately in not only the death of the chicken in hand, but also caused two cars, one with a male driver aged 35 and the other with a female driver aged 42 and her two children, to collide. This cost hundreds of pounds in damage for the male driver, who escaped with minor injuries, and the death of one of the woman's children. The whole event was an unnecessary disaster.

Two goldfish are sat in a tank, one says to the other 'I forgot who you are' to which the other replies 'I forgot what you said'.

A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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