Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead!

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Six million.

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The horse said "nay."

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Why couldn't sally drive her car? Because sally is a girl.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Its just a bulge I swear its not a bomb

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Why did the Jew cross the road? He was hungry and there was a McDonalds on the other side of the street.

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What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

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Once upon a time there was a girl who was going out with a boy 2 years older tan her. He was 16 and she was 14. Does it make him a pedo? cause everyone says he is.

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A man got a promotion at work. Now he makes more money.

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I like vagina, hahahahah!!!!!!!!!!

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Billy is walking down the street when he spots 1 armed johnny hanging in a tree.Billy proceeds to wave causing Johnny to wave with his 1 arm. Johnny falls out of the tree and dies

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Wanna hear an oxymoron? Jews for Jesus.

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Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

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why did the chicken cross the street? it didn't.

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whats sad about three black men driving off a cliff in a cadillac? a cadillac seats five.

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What did the boy say 2+2 was? 4

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WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

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A man walks into a bar. He hit his head so hard that he went into a coma.

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What's flatter than a pancake? The baby I just ran over.

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Whats fat, brown and on the ground? A chubby indian kid

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What did Billy get for christmas? Nothing he died of lung cancer.

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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An abortionist secretly fancies himself pro life, with reservations. Overwhelmed, and utterly fed up, with the burden of carrying on the family business, he aborts himself. Although he was only 46, his frail mother was nevertheless proud of his decision to succeed where she had failed 46 years ealier.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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