Your everything I've ever dreamed of you sing like a bird your gorgeous your funny your friendly your sensitive your caring your unique and one day I will kill you.

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Q: What did the hobo get for his birthday? A: Older.

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Why did elmo jump of the cliff caus he was depresed

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When does a blond laugh and cry? When she's raped by a clown.

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Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. False. Violets are violet

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What do you call a kid with a peg leg and an eye patch? Names

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What did the man do when he saw there was water spilled on his desk? He waited two hours for it to evaporate because he was too lazy to wipe it up.

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How is it called a black man piloting a plane? Pilot, you racist!

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You're mom is so black... that she is most likely of African Descent

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- I did your mom last night! - Thanks, Dad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

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People with the best sense of humor visit anti-joke.com.

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Noobz -wondering why your valid anti-joke is getting voted down? Simply because it's a repeat, someone else has already submitted it. Only the original is valid for positive to votes. The regulars on here willallvote a repeat down immediately. I have 3 accounts set upwith different IP's just to do that. You have been warned. Search first mo fo's

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what did the frog say to the princess? nothing because frogs do not possess sufficient linguistic skills to communicate with humans

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Why did Doris want to father children? Because she wanted to have a fry-up with the leftover baby oil

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What's the same between a plane a bird and a piece of celery? They all fly except the celery

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I cat tried to jump over a fence It was electrified

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a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

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What did the boy do when he was bored and broke? He took to the streets selling illicit drugs such as cocaine. Although dangerous, the rush from said danger solved his boredom problem. On top of this, there is a huge market for such substances and he was not broke for much longer.

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What do you do when you need shade? CALL RAYSEAN

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I walked down the street. I picked up a quarter. It was shiny. Then I walked to school. I finished school, so I walked home, did my homework, and went to bed. Lesson learned: quadratic formula

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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