a chinese man and an irishman walk into a bar. This is odd because these men are from countries extremely far apart from one another

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What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Why do white people wear black shirts? Why do black people wear white shirts?

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What did the lion say to the octopus? Nothing, lions can't talk, and even if they did the chances of a lion and octopus meeting are very slim.

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A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

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What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shih-tzu? Dogs are large and solid objects and therefore cannot be mixed together.

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What's worse than a giant paint bubble? TWO GIANT PAINT BUBBLES!

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Howmuch wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Anyone? I'm trying to settle a bet.

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What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

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Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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What do you call a man who has committed more than 10 crimes? Whatever his name happens to be.

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Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

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A homeless boy walks up to a woman. "I'm hungry" "Then you should eat something."

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: 9/11

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she was blind and deaf.

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

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what happened to walt disney when he died? nothing he was frozen and has been for many years now

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What's worse than being killed? Reading these jokes.

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How do you get an elephant in pajamas? Elephants are large mammals with several layers of body fat, and pajamas are for humans. there is no purpose in attempting this feat at all.

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What's funnier than Man on Woman domestic abuse? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -because chickens have a free ability to walk and this chicken felt the urge to walk across the road. Why not?

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What did the black kid get for christmas? Nothing, he doesn't celebrate christmas

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What is funnier than 9 black fellas dead in a trashbin? 1 black fella dead in 9 trashbins.

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What's the difference between black people and dog shit? One of them eventually turns white and stops smelling.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops