Whats the differance between a preist and acne? Acne dosent cum on your face untill your 12

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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Q. Why did the monster have eight legs? A. I don't know.

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Its simple, if people do not have the willpower to follow their own desires, their own wishes, they do not deserve to. I have no desire to resurrect what is doomed to fail again and again, that is idealism, of course we would all have liked our own little society where people are encouraged to accept who they are and respect their own kin, regardless of race, culture and so on. But we did our best, we gave our teen years, and what did we end up with? If you think I have given up, you are right, I will help you do your thing however, but I will not stand beside you when the tide turns, had I joined you, we would all have been killed or imprisoned at best, all while "The Wizard" would have gone free maybe even with money and a medal.

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Why couldn't the duck get his driver's license? Well, it was a duck and as far as we're concerned they don't have thumbs or arms and are therefore incapable of driving.

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Robocop and T-800 where fighting, first the T-800 manages to injure Robocop critically, but Robocop manages to repair himself and break T-800`s legs off, which T-800 suddenly regrows due to an unexpected upgrade. After several hours of combat, where civilians are injured and half the town is destroyed they where both worn out, but ready for one last struggle... ...Eventually there was a great celebration for whoever won.

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Q: How do you get a kleenex to dance? A: Put a little boogey in it!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme coffee table.

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A:Will you be my valentine? B:No

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Why is Alex Mann Fat? Because he doesnt eat healthy food.

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What do you get when you mix a fox and a sloth? a..FOTH

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Chayton

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What do you call two gay men playfully wrestling? Immature.

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Why did Jimmy fail his math test? Because he had a mental disability

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What does a Jew do when he sees a masked man at his door? He grabs a phone to alert the police and hides in his bedroom.

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Why didn't the bear go snowboarding? It was hibernating

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A duckling is following its mother, but gets separated. Noticing that her child is lost the mother duck calls out, and the duckling finds her quickly.

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What's green and has wheels? Green cars.

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"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

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dave lee travis walks into a radio station , plays some records , talks randomly , and a good time is had by all.

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A 36 year old Canadian woman.

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Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

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How do you piss off a female archeologist? Kill her dog.

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A woman goes to the hospital to receive an ultra-sound after taking a pregnancy test a few weeks before. The doctor comes out and says "Congratulations Susanne would you like to know the results? Susanne says "No thank you." Then, the doctor says "Good, because its actually a retarded baby that we found."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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