Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? The video game he really wanted.

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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What's worse than eating an apple with aids? Loosing your virginity to the seven chosen ones.

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Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

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Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? Because it was attached to the first elephant. Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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So, I was eating out this girl Until I tasted something like horse semen. So I looked up at her and said; " Ah grandma, so that's how you died ! ".

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What do Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston have in common? They were both great singers.

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What do you get if you cross James Bond with Osama bin Laden? James bin Laden.

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A- Knock Knock B- Who's there? A- Soccer!

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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Her lips aren't proportionally fit to her face

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Roses are red Violets are blue What was I saying? Oh yeah, your adopted.

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If I lock you in a room and let a snake in under the door, what do you get? A problem.

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roses are brown, violets are brown, who the hell sh** on my garden?

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This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

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What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

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What is green and red all over? The Hulk's Penis in a blender

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A germaphobe is in a room full of sick people. He leaves.

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What did the frog say to the beautiful sleeping princess? Ribbit

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What did the orange elephant with 6 legs say? Kill me.

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how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

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Knock knock Who's there? No-one who??? *Silence*

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Why was the girl crying? She got kicked in the vagina

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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