how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Two young men ignoring societies expectations of them and instead choosing to play the sport they enjoy the most.

Wanna Hear A Joke ? Afgan

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dwayne. Ok... come in.

what does chuck norris use to cut scissors? another scissor.

What did the Leah say to the Pawneez? AWWWW YEAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What do you call a muslim? A terrorist

Today, we will be identifying power tools. This is not a drill.

I said I read te terms of service. I didnt

A fat boy walked into a party

What's the difference between a white guy and a black guy? Their skin color.

cow: MooooooooMoooooooo trafic light: beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep man:AHHHHHHHHHHH GET THIS FAT THING OF, OF ME NOW cow: MOOOOOOO (you shouldnt of said that or i wouldnt of swallowed you) man:TELL MY WIFE I LOVE HER (L.W)

How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

What's worse than a giant paint bubble? TWO GIANT PAINT BUBBLES!

What do you call a muslim behind the controls of an airliner? A pilot you rascist.

-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

A seal walks into a club.

I saw a man with a hungry look in his eye, like the kind you get from not eating for a while

roses are red, violets are blue, hey reed and steven, we should hang out

What did the black man say when he received cold fried chicken at a restaurant? He very politely asked for it to be warmed up, and exuded nothing but elegance and class.

Where's my tractor?

A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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