why did the man cross the road? Because he needed to cross the road to reach his destination that was across the road

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Me.

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Why Can't Asian women drive? a: Cause they are chink assholes who have only peripheral vision

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What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

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your moms so fat... she ways like 300 pounds.

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"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

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How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

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Contrary to popular belief- And this just in. My daughter has breast cancer.

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My butt!!!!

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What is one thing you can't buy at the store? Toast

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Drop a brick on her face.

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What is worse than being ran over by a bus? Nothing really.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To mourn the loss of his daughter who died due a fatal car crash, caused by him while he was driving. across the street

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what is black, white, and red all over? A bloody panda

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GRAAAAAAAAAAAR.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What did the blind man do in the dark room? Nothing, he couldn't see.

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Why wasnt the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled

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Wanna hear a good joke? I don't.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What's long, hard, and full of semen? a penis.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

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what's the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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