Why did the leper go back into the shower? he missed a spot.

A man walks to a bar. He drinks too much and dies. His family is informed later that evening.

8===========D O:

Why did the chicken cross the road it didn't, it was hit by a bus.

What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't, it won't come.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well neither has he.

What do you call a strait man that is also gay? Bisexual.

what is worse the Holocaust or slavery? patantan!

How do you escape a vicious tiger? You cleverly create a distraction so the tiger's focus is not on you. Then, you quickly run away because the tiger doesn't know you are leaving.

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels

how do you take a shit in public? pull down your pants and push in public

You smell bad? Cool.

why did the chicken cross the road because everyone on the other side already had bird flu

Yo mamma is so fat, when Dracula bit her, he got type 2 diabetes.

why did the man cross the road? Because he needed to cross the road to reach his destination that was across the road

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Me.

Why Can't Asian women drive? a: Cause they are chink assholes who have only peripheral vision

What do you call a lady that cleans? A cleaning lady.

your moms so fat... she ways like 300 pounds.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue It is Valentines Day So I had to get them for you or we would get into a big fight, which will end up with me on the couch.

What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Dad they tell me I am homosexual at school, what does it mean? Ask your boyfriend.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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