Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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Why did the basketball player shoot the ball? Because it was being mean to him

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Why did a monkey fall out of a tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of a tree? Gravity. Why did the third monkey fall out of a tree? He was stapled to the second monkey.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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Jake Bowar

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What do you call a dead blonde in a closet? A rape victim.

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To retrieve his dead relatives in the middle of the street.

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That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

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why did the girl fall of the swing because she was pushed of by obama

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How are you supposed to breath with no air? um jorden sparks you dont?

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Why didn't the man kiss his wife. Because he had no lips.

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BOOBIES!!!!!!!

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A: Knock knock! A: Who's there? A: Forever A: Forever who? A: Forever Alone

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What is white on the top and black on the bottom? Society

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Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

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Cassie Mills you are gay stop being silly in class you're not funny.

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Q; Why was the man loosing his hair? A; Because since he was at an older age, he was going bald.

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1234 5

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Don't go to the last anti-joke page, they're all terrible or repeated I hope this isn't one of them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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