What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing. Fruits can't talk.

Funny joke to play on an elderly woman: Take her cane and push her In front of a bus.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm horny and your bodily figure is very attractive Get naked

I once ate at a restaurant where the food was so bad that the chef's name was Earl.

Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Not the World Trade Center.

S.O.P.A

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the immigrants.

Why didn't the boy finish his homework? He was in a coma.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree ... Because it was dead

What's so funny about an anti-joke? Nothing.

A man farted. Another man walked away.

What do you call a guy so fat that he can't fit in a bath tub? A guy so fat that he can't fit in a bath tub.

Women's Rights

If u and I jumped off a cliff..who would land first? who cares..

Wanna hear an oxymoron? Jews for Jesus.

Roses are black, violets are black, i am blind!

what to you call a black person that flies planes? a pilot YOU RACIST

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

A black guy moves in to your neighborhood. The housing values plummet due to the current economic recession.

The phantom menace is the best star wars movie

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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