Yo Mommas so poor, when i went to her house and started to clear out the cob webs, she said why the heck are you tearing down the curtains.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

say iphone 5 times then look under your pillow ...nothings there

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an apple and slicing your mouth on a razorblade

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why does a trash can smell bad? Because there's trash in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Which way do gay people walk? in One Direction

thumb_up thumb_down +39

h

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why was the little kid bullied? Because his name was Hugh Jass.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you torture Helen Keller? Leave the plunger in her toilet with the handle greased.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Yo mama so fat she has an increased risk of blood clots!

thumb_up thumb_down +33

-Knock Knock -Whos there? -The police -OH SHIT

thumb_up thumb_down +33

1, 2, buckle my shoe. 3, 4, shut the door. 5, 6, I'm gonna to cut you in your sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A zucchini is walking down the street, when he spots a cucumber club on his left hand side. Having nothing else to do he decides to walk in. When he walks into the club all of the cucumbers stop and stare at this strange being in their club. Finally, after having one too many drinks, one cucumber decides that this ridiculousness has gone on long enough and it is up to him to say something, so he goes up to the zucchini and says, "Hey buddy, what's your problem, clearly you are in a cucumber club and you're a zucchini." The zucchini just looks at him, puzzled, and responds " A cucumber club? I thought this was a ucumber club!!!!!"... It's funny because zucchinis are dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? The Mexican is alive and the park bench isn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

roses are red violets are blue i dont really care about you

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Have you heard the story of the empty room? Theres nothing in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A really hot girl walks past 2 guys and the following conversation is produced... Guy1:damn! look at that ass! Guy2:yep I bet shit comes from that thing! When's the last time she had diarrhea?!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

An Irishman walks into a bar. He quickly exits as he thought it was the Polish restaurant located directly nextdoor. He then enters the Polish restaurant and orders a delicious lunch. He tips his waiter 20%.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops