Adam Sandler.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

h

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Shit happens. Correction: feces happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A man is driving home from work. he realizes he left his suitcase back at the office. he turns around and drives back to the office. he walks in the office and grabs his suitcase, and as he's walking out he's stopped by his boss. his boss simply asks "what are you doing in the office at this time, Eric?" the man replies to his boss " sorry sir i was just grabbing my suitcase as i forgot to bring it as i was leaving work" his boss lets him pass " okay Eric, have a good night" the man get back in his car and drives home. but on his way home a pedestrian runs in front of the road. the man runs him over unintentionly. the man is jailed with manslaughter for 4 and a half years

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Knock Knock Who's there? Gestapo.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why was the woman convicted or arson? She set her house on fire. Why did she set her house on fire? Her husband was beating her.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Q: A black person and a white person decided to have a race, who won? A: The black person, as he exercised and worked out on a regular basis, making him very fast.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

come along children

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A disabled man runs into a bar. He notices he's not disabled and realizes his mother lied to him his whole life.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A few black men walk into a bank... They all open seperate savings accounts and add a portion of that week's pay to put forward money to pay for their children's college education.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Where was Susie when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for his birthday? Broken arms and legs

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Women's Basketball.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Wha'ts Slippery when wet? A Wet Slipper.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Roses are red Violets are blue Little billy was annoying me But he can't anymore Because now he's dead In a burlap sack In the back of my truck And it's really bloody back there

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A black man and a Mexican are hired as day laborers by a white man. The black man cleans the house while the Mexican mows and trims the yard. Both are hard-working and attempting to provide for their families in a down economy.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you call a Jew in Harlem? It depends on what his name is. I advise procuring a polite introduction from a mutual acquaintance.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops