Whats worse than the holocaust??having a downstndrome for a child

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Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

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Q: What is the difference between a black man and a Park bench? A: A park bench is an inanimate object.

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whats really hot the sun

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

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Do you wanna build a snowman? Person: do you wanna live * or nah

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Why isn't Neil Patrick Harris like Barney Stinson in real life? Because he's gay

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To mamas so fat shes fat

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A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a soda. The bartender says, "We don't serve soda." The guy then says, "oh", and walks out.

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb in your apple.

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead. Why did the second Koala fall off the tree? Cause it was also dead. Why did the third Koala fall off the tree? It thought the other two were playing a game. Why did the motorcyclist end up in the hospital? He was attacked by falling Koalas!

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What is brown and smells? Poop

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Avery has crabs.

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Guess what's funny? People voting for their own Anti joke.

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- I have cancer. - SUCK IT UP!!!

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What was the pirate's favorite letter? Q.

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Why does smokey bears wife never have kids? Because every time she gets hot smokey beats he with a shovel

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police, we found your cat's body on the side of the road.

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What happens when you pour Red Bull on a butterfly without wings? It drowns......

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Dozer has a soul

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A scottish and a mexican were walking on the streets when the mexican got hit by a car. The scottish man called the ambulance and walkked away.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, it doesn't last as long for fat people...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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