How did Little Jimmie leave school? In a body bag.

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Dad they tell me I am homosexual at school, what does it mean? Ask your boyfriend.

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What did the Shark say when he had no lunch? We have a FISHue!

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A horse walks into a bar the bar tender says hey you cant be in here you are a horse so the horse leaves.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

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Girl: Do you like me :D Boy: No Girl: =( Boy: You didn'y ask me if i loved you Girl: :D Do you love me Boy: Naw

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Beans beans, they're good for your heart, the more you eat the less at risk you become to such health problems as diabetes and heart attacks. The increased carbohydrates and antioxidant properties maintain a manageable balance for the body's digestive system to maintain a good constant internal environment.

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Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

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What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

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A sick patient asks a doctor, "will i be able to play my guitar?" The doctor replies, "of course you will be able to". "Good because that is my only form of income", says the patient.

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What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

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Why did the young boy say "Fuck"? He has Tourrete's

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What did the one man say to the other? Nothing, they didn't know eachother

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Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

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What did the priest say to the rabbi? "Hey Joe, how's the family?"

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Everything is red. I soaked it in the blood of small children.

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What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

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Paul Dylan King!

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

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A boy watches as a firefighter saves a little girl from a fire and looks at his mom saying "I want to be a firefighter when i grow up mommy" The mom looks down and replies "Silly kid you're not gunna grow up you have leukemia."

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What do you call a man with three arms and three legs and no nose. A highly unlikely instance that no one would believe is real.

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What walks on four legs in the morning, two in the afternoon, and one in the evening? A dog that plays in traffic all day.

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What do people do in France when they are hungry? Get something to eat.

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what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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