what do you get if you cross a lion with a pig? nothing as the lion would more than likely end up eating the high in fat pig.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for nothing? black

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CHIIIICKKIIIIIIIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Where are the keys?

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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You won't put that in your ass.... No shit.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have feeble minds and tend to wander around.

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How does a plumber cross the street? Using his legs

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What is worse than peeling a orange that is chasing a dog with raining men? Meeting johnny appleseed

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Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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What's better than winning at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Why do witches ride on brooms? Because they have magical powers!

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Haha

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What's worse than being beaten by your Father? Well, it depends.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a Ford Taurus stapled to his face.

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a man walked out of church and said F***!

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

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A man walks into a bar. He says ow

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There are two horses in a stable. They were just talking about the weather and other normal things. Suddenly, the dog ran in. "HELP, HELP!!!" The dog screamed. Farmer Brandy got stuck in the tractor!!! The horses said, "HOLY SHIT........... A TALKING DOG!!!!"

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What is this, a center for ants? No, this is a model of the building proportionally smaller than the one we will be building.

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Why did the mother have an abortion? Because she thought it would best financially for her current family.

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? Google it!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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