Why was the hamster not on his wheel? Because he had a stroke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the voices told him to...

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A kid goes to the doctor and orders a salad. The doctor replies, "This is a smoking-free environment". The kid puts out his cigar and goes to Olive Garden to get his physical.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face.

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What's wrong with your hand!!!!!???? nothing.

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Your Mother is so pretty that she does not need make-up.

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair because the vest has no sleeves.

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When does 1=17? How many schizophrenics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

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What is red, and bucket shaped? A red bucket.

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What did the homeless guy do when he saw a bucket? He peed in it

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Why did the black guy drown in the river?? unfortunately he owed 10,000 dollars to a loan shark and couldnt pay his dues So he was tied to an anchor and put in the river.

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What's red and creeps up your leg? A homesick abortion.

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what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

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What's big, brown, and barks? Tree

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Jonny runs with scissors. He gets hit by a bus.

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How many black guys does it take to change a lightbulb? None can, since noone can work together because they cant see eachother.

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what did Barak Obama order at Dunking Donuts. a donut

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Dan O'Driscoll

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im dylan, i wank over teabaging people on cod

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My life sucks, I'm about 20 years old, and i haven't changed aged for 15 years, I'm stuck in this dead end fast food job, my colleague hates me, my boss is a money crazed freak, my best friend is a mentally retarded immature weirdo and to top it all off, I live in a pineapple under the sea.

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a hard working man goes home after a long day at work to find that his wife left him for his even harder working father.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Orange What? Orange Who the hell are you and what do you want? Orange I am calling the police if you do not get off my doorstep in 5 seconds you a$$hole

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knock knock Come in.

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Q: Why did the plain crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. By: LV

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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