Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

Why did the lizard turn blue? He was low on oxygen.

A man with AIDS walks into a bar, what does he say? I have AIDS

Man I'm Bored Nice to meet you.

Why did the dad buy his son some ice cream? He didnt, his dad is dead

I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned

There was an old man from Limerick. He was of scottish ancestry and nearing his 76th birthday.

Wanna hear an oxymoron? Jews for Jesus.

Oh no! I forgot the milk!

What do you call a guy who acts straight but is really not? Verl.

You know what's sad about the Special Olympics? Even of you win, your still retarded.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a truck

baby seal walks into a bar

A man went into a bakers to buy a loaf of bread. The baker said 'What can i do for you sir?' The man said 'Id like a loaf of blue bread please.' Baker replied 'Sorry sir we only sell brown or white here.' 'Thats ok.' said the man, 'I have my bike outside.' [This joke was made up by myself and my school friends in 1975 age 15. We all told it for years - i still do - and cried with laughter whenever we heard it. We called them non jokes :-) ]

What do your friends and a tree have in common? They both die if you set them on fire.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tied to the first monkey.

what do you call a shoe with legs? roadrunners.

Why did the bird fall? It was an ostrich

why didn't bobby eat breakfast? because i stapled his head to the floor

What do you call a white man in the NBA? A really good basketball player

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

What did the African boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he celebrates Kwanza.

Who lives with josh moran? A gay asian

What do you call two guys hanging by your window? Kurt and Rod

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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