onranges are orange bananas are yellow and apples are red/green ................... and im ................. PINK (lw/kc)

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I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I drink water!

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How did Hitler die? He saw his gas bill

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Why was the black man hanged? He was charged with piracy in the 1500s..

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A soccer player, a basketball player, a football player, a hockey player, and a baseball player all walk into a bar at different time periods of the day

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How do you keep an extraordinary magician from performing his show? Replace his shampoo with battery acid

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ram My Penis Into Ram My Penis Into Who? Me.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

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Two Jewish men walk into a butcher shop. They don't buy any pork because that is a fundamental dietary restriction placed upon by their religion.

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solve y = [1 arctan (x)] / [2-3 arctan (x)]

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Susie has Autism

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Knock knock! Who's there? Dick! Dick who? Dick Stewart, your neighbor from next door!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

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Today i told myself i would write a joke... Joke... ????????????LAUGH!????????????

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What did the young boy get for Christmas? All his brothers belongings because his brother died

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Why did Johnny buy the strawberry ice cream? Because when he gets the chocolate he vomits and bleeds out of his asshole.

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what does trondifly mean? trondify is not a real word.

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

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Three hispanic men pull up to a suburban residence. They pick up their friend and go see a movie.

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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Why did the man die? He jumped of a bridge and then got run over by a train.

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Knock, knock. Come in!

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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