Whats worse than ten babies in one bin? One baby in ten bins.

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a man sees a monkey playing the drums at first he thought it waz the guy in the monkey suit that plays the drums but on closer inspection he sees that it is in fact a real monkey on that note he tries to befriend the monkey but the monkey soon tore the man into pieces

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What happened when Dave tried to break the record for most marshmallows in the mouth at once? He choked and died.

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How do you make a business man cry? Hit him in the face with a brick

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Q:What's the difference between a duck? A: The higher it flies, the much.

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Why did Obama win the president election He had a greater amount of votes that Jonh mccain

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have herpes. If I were you I would get tested.

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why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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What's the similarity between a dog and a car? They're both made out of atoms.

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Why did the black man swim across the lake? He didnt. He drowned

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What is black, white, and red all over? A domino dipped in kitten blood.

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Once upon a time.

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Why is my car broken? Because I drove it into a wall.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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NEVER

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Whats White and sticky? Semen

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What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIPCREAM!

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman all walked into a bar. But, the bartender was not happy, as he had noticed that each of them were wearing tops with rude slogans on them. The Bartender said to the Englishman, "you do know that your t-shirt isn't suitable for the children in here, don't you?" "Oh," said the Englishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home to change it at once." Next, came the Irishman, who's top was slightly worse than the Englishman's. The bartender said to the Irishman, "you do know that the joke on your jumper is sexist, don't you?" "Oh," said the Irishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home and change it at once." Last, was the Scotsman. The Scotsman's top was particularly bad, and the bartender especially did not want this top to be seen in his bar. So, the bartender said to the Scotsman, "you do know that the slogan on your cardigan is racist, don't you?" "Oh," said the scotsman, "I'll go home and change it at once."

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Knock Knock. Who the hells there? Nevermind.

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Commercials lie: I think that they do believe it's not butter!

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What's the best part about a birthday cake? Eating it.

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What did my mom get for christmas? My dad, D1ck in a box. My dad's name is Richard.

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why did the chicken cross the road because everyone on the other side already had bird flu

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why did the man cross the road? Because he needed to cross the road to reach his destination that was across the road

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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