yo mama is so fat, she should seriously consider gastric bypass surgery, morbid obesity is extremely detrimental to one's health

suck my dick.

Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

What's worse than nine dead babies hanging in a tree? One dead baby hanging in nine trees.

Q:whats yellow and flys through walls A:A magical Banana

Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

Babies are like landmines; when you step on them they explode.

Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because he was dead...

a man walked into a bar, however the bar was in Pakistan so he got shot by terrorists

What's long, hard, and full of semen? a penis.

Baseball

What do a duck and an elephant have in common? They're both yellow. Except for the elephant.

Knock, Knock. Come in.

whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

Why did the little boy die? Because he had cancer.

Why cant stevie wonder see? He is blind

Whats funny about ISIS? Nothing, you asshole, its terrifying.

Konock Konock Uh, you spelt knock knock wrong... Oh.

How many Coldplay members can you fit in a car? All of them, the standard car has four seats or more. Coldplay has 4 members so it makes perfect logical sense

what time is it rape time

Wanna hear a good joke? I don't.

Why can't Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukemia.

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Fish

What did the bartender say to the midget as he entered the bar? Nothing besides attempting to serve him in the same manner as any other reveller whilst attempting to disguise his sense of pity for the midget's debilitating and somewhat stigmatised condition.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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