Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

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How do you know a dude is dead? He doesn't breath, he has no color in the face and his heart has stoped.

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

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What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

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Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

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hi

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a dead hooker? One is a car and one is a human being.

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How can you tell if a Mexican's gay? Ask politely.

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What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

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-Knock Knock -Whos there? -The police -OH SHIT

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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Why did the man drink water? Because he was thirsty

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HAHA SO ONE TIME... The man could not finish his story because he gets shot, and is mourned for years. His daughter was watching it all. She then jumped. And fell. And broke her knee. And then died. yeah

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Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

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What did the tourist in Africa get? A souvenior.

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what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree ? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was attached to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a monkey.

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A horse walks into a bar...n

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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Your mother is so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and eat foods with nutritional value.

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what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

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How did the fat man die? Clogged arteries leading to a heart attack.

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really desperate to get laid guy gives out phone number in random places 5802352343 :D

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops