What's purple and eats rocks? Scientists are still looking into this question.

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What did Jeff say to the guy who stole his car? Can I have my car back.

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Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkled? Because if they were small, white, and round they'd be called aspirin.

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What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa is a jolly Christmas figure that delivers presents to children and Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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Why did the man take off all his clothes? He was going to take a shower.

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Roses are brown, violets are brown, who keeps shitting in my garden?

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so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

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What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

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What did the burn victim get for Christmas? A book of matches

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How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

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Which way do gay people walk? in One Direction

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Why was Superman white? Because Jerry Siegel is a racist.

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If you are a girl reading this! why did you stop making some food?

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What did Sarah Palin say to her daughter on Christmas? Merry Christmas

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How many jews can you fit in a car? That depends on the volume of the car and the size of the people involved - different cars are of different sizes and can fit a different number of people. For instance, you could probably fit more than 20 midget jews in a van but you could probably not fit as many overweight jews in a coupé. However if you put some effort into getting as many standard sized people, in this case jews for reasons unknown, into a standard size sedan you should be able to fit about seven or eight in the car itself and one in the trunk, making a total of nine or ten.

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there are 4 men in a bar talking about how well their sons are doing with their lives. But one man goes to the toilet. So the first man says 'my son is doing really well he is the head of a airline company and for christmas he got his bestfriend a plane.' The second man says' My son is doing really well he has his own car brand and for christmas he got his bestfriend a brand new car.' The third man says' Well my son is doing really well, He owns his own housing estate business and for christmas he bought his best friend a 250'000 sq foot mansion. The fourth man comes out of the toilet and all the three men say ' We are talking about how our sons are doing in their lives so what about yours.' The fourth man goes' well my son is gay but its not that bad because for christmas his three boyfriends got him a new plane, a new car and a 250'000 sq foot mansion.'

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why did the mans hair start to get shorter the barber was shaving it!

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Cadaliac? That was my Cadaliac

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I'm not as random as you think i salad.

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The duck says do you smell poop. Ya says the chicken, it wasn't me It was the turkey

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

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Why did the little girl fall down She was shot in the leg

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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