roses are red violets are red everything's red i'm colour blind

thumb_up thumb_down -1

solve y = [1 arctan (x)] / [2-3 arctan (x)]

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is worse than peeling a orange that is chasing a dog with raining men? Meeting johnny appleseed

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is worse than getting a paper cut? Your whole family dying to MERS in Peru before you were old enough to remember any of them.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money issues and how she wanted a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man: "Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor: "You have aids"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Doctor: your mom has cancerous aids Me:*sob*

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the girl cross the road? She didn't. Well, she tried but when she was halfway there, she was hit by a bus and had to be rushed to the hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Yo Momma is so ugly she probably doesn't have any friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is black and white and green and red and purple and orange and magenta and brown and yellow all at the same time? Can you tell me? Cause I've got no clue.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Mommy, where do babies come from? In biology, sex is a process of combining and mixing genetic traits, often resulting in the specialization of organisms into a male or female variety (each known as a sex). Sexual reproduction involves combining specialized cells (gametes) to form offspring that inherit traits from both parents. Gametes can be identical in form and function (known as isogametes), but in many cases an asymmetry has evolved such that two sex-specific types of gametes (heterogametes) exist: male gametes are small, motile, and optimized to transport their genetic information over a distance, while female gametes are large, non-motile and contain the nutrients necessary for the early development of the young organism. An organism's sex is defined by the gametes it produces: males produce male gametes (spermatozoa, or sperm) while females produce female gametes (ova, or egg cells); individual organisms which produce both male and female gametes are termed hermaphroditic. Frequently, physical differences are associated with the different sexes of an organism; these sexual dimorphisms can reflect the different reproductive pressures the sexes experience. Thanks mommy

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it? being raped by justin beiber

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is a dinosaurs favorite chips? Doritos.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between Jews and boy scouts? Boy scouts come back from their camps

thumb_up thumb_down -5

when Bonquisha and Letroy had a baby girl what did they name her? Courtney.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the patient say when the doctor told him he had aids? "Oh my god. Are you sure?"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A fat guy at starbucks, waiting for his regular 160lbs breakfest. why is the 10 black kid crying? he's hungry and there is no starbucks in somalia .

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happened to the boy who lost his arm? He got on suprisingly well in life considering he has the use of only one arm, and got a terrific job. He managed to meet a woman, , and he was a generally happy guy. He lived to a great age, and he, nor anyone around him, ever thought of him as different or disabled. It's good to hear a happy anti joke once in a while isn't it guys?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your mother is so ugly, because she was badly beaten.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There are two horses in a stable. They were just talking about the weather and other normal things. Suddenly, the dog ran in. "HELP, HELP!!!" The dog screamed. Farmer Brandy got stuck in the tractor!!! The horses said, "HOLY SHIT........... A TALKING DOG!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A. I have a really funny knock knock joke to tell you! You start. B. Knock knock A. Who's there? B. ....

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why couldn't sally drive her car? Because sally is a girl.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

hi. thats what she said.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops