How do you make an idiot laugh? Tell him a mildly funny joke relating to bodily functions, such as defecating or passing gas.

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Why are all black people fast? They aren't. Some of them are slow.

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Q: What has one eye but cannot see? A: A blind cyclops

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What do you call a man wearing a hockey mask and holding a chainsaw? A Lumberjack, I lied about the hockey mask

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Why didn't the [any object] catch on fire? Because there was water on it. Why didn't the [other object] catch on fire? Because there was water on it. [repeat ad infinitum]

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Q:What do they call her? A: They call her love,

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If you don't live in the country, where do you live? The ocean.

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1unno;njfjk

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why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey wahy did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it thought it was a game why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? because it had no arms why did the little girl fall off her bike? she got hit by three monkeys and a refridgerator

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What happened to the boy who got everything he ever wanted? He turned into a gluttonous and greedy adult who eagerly spent all of his money and subsequently died alone.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2.

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What does the latin maid does when I tell har to clean behind the couch? Nothing, she doesn't speak English.

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I went seal clubbing the other day but as I was the only one with legs, the dancefloor was quite lonely

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A priest walks into a day care center. He calmly blesses all of the surrounding children a leaves.

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F@ck me in the ass until I say STOP. Before we start, can you please ducktape my mouth?

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why did ben perve on the 5 year old girl he is a pedofile

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Yo momma so fat, she can't preform physical exercises with proper form.

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How many muslims does it take to screw in a lightbulb. One.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can't rhyme Refrigerator

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Roses are red violets are blue why dont u go take a shower

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Your mom was so stupid that she went back to school and now she is graduated with a degree.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars except the duck.

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German sausage is the wurst

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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