Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To hold their pants up.

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What is a dinosaurs favorite chips? Doritos.

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What did the man do when he saw the dog? Ran it over

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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what did the black person say to the midget my dicks bigger than u

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antijokes

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Justin Bieber

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Your mom goes to college

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I can't stick my dick in a watermelon.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a cooler? 5. using a blender to puree` = 9

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How do you fit 100 charizards into a bus? Put them into pokeballs. Otherwise, there would be no possible way because Charizards are such large creatures.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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What do you call a gay drive by? a fruit rollup

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How did the blonde screw in a lightbulb? She didn't, she fell and broke her neck and went to a hospital. Thus you should not laugh.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Joke.

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Wolf Pussy

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Why did the black man win the race? Because he was talented and hardworking.

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Why couldnt Jimmy swing on the swing? because Jimmy's a fish

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead.

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how do you fit 100 jews in a car? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back seat, and 95 in the ash tray.

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Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

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Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? You would too if your name was Hjshdvcyehbretafvvba.

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What does Lady Gaga call Hitler? Nothing special because she doesn't refer to him in everyday's speech.

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What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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