what's long, skin colored, erect, and limp? a finger.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? It's Bob. Oh hi, Bob, come on in.

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I scream. You scream. We all scream.

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Penis in a box.

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Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

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Knock knock, Knock knock jokes aren't funny.

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Scenario: 2 guys with big feet and a camels Anus are hiking on Mount Everest with a set of elephants dildos Man 1: what's the difference between a Volkswagen and a clock? Man 2: what? Man 1: you can't toboggan of a green house roof with a tub of Vaseline and a ostrich party on lady gaga's Anus

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yo mama's so sexy... wait, thats not how it goes

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American Idol

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Q: what happens when you throw a red rock into a blue lake? A: a splash.

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What has one eye but cannot see? A brick with an eye drawn on it

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why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding half a worm and wondering where the other half is. o.O

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Star Wars

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Do you want to hear a joke? Well, I do too.

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Ask me if I'm a giraffe Are you a giraffe? Yes

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What do you put on top of salad? Salad Dressing.

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whats the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Osama Bin Laden. Oh wait...

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BARRACK OBAMA.............WHAT A JOKE!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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