Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

Did you hear about the guy with seven fingers? You should, because almost everybody has seven fingers.

Why did the black man rob the russian guy? He didn't. He was too scared.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Once upon a time there was a prince and a princess. They married as was the social custom of the time, and produced a series of children whose purpose was to sustain the royal bloodline for many years to come. AF

Q: What did the casual mathematician discover at the end of his vivid rainbow of dreams (Question mark- key`s screwed) A: Enough dirt to fill 3141592+ treasure chests to the brim.

So a blonde was trying to peel a banana, but she couldn't because she was viciously attacked by chimpanzees and had all her fingers bitten off

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because chickens can move and the road just happened to be in its path.

What do Jews, Jehovah's Witnesses, Slavs, Gays, and Retards have in common? The Holocaust.

i heart wiener

What is underneath Chuck Norris' Beard? His Chin

Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

dfghfgdfhfdhfgdfghdfh

Mexicans working in an office

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Chuck Norris. Alright come in.

Why is my car broken? Because I drove it into a wall.

NEVER

Why was 9 afraid of 1? Because when dialed together, an emergency call was most likely coming and 9 is very sensitive to those types of moments

What is a dinosaurs favorite chips? Doritos.

antijokes

A recently engaged couple are having sex. The man finishes in just under 3 minutes as usual. The woman then says "I love you" because they've been together for over 2 years and they care for each other very deeply.

Roses are black biolets are black I colorblind

It says so on your cap.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...