whats the differnce between a baby and a dart board? dart boards dont bleed.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? UPS.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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What do you call a black guy with Alzheimer's? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE

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memes

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2 blonds are driving on the road on their way to Disney Land. They come to the sign that says Disney Land left so they started crying, turned around and went home.

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Why couldn't the 14 year old find a date? Because he had a speech impediment and girls avoided him usually.

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A Mexican walked away from a construction site.

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for his birthday? Broken arms and legs

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How can you tell if a woman is dead? She has no pulse.

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? One is a popular Italian food and the other is a human being.

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Why was Adam sad his dog got ran over? He was holding the dog.

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What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

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Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

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Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

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A black and a mexican start a resturaunt it turns out to be a big success and they make a chain and profit from it.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

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Q: What's black and blue and red all over? A: I'm not sure. If it's red all over, it's not going to be black or blue.

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dead babies

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a bagel.

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Why happened when a clothes line walked into a bar? He got hung over

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The economy sucks. REM broke up. A man killed himself.

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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im black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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