So a blonde was trying to peel a banana, but she couldn't because she was viciously attacked by chimpanzees and had all her fingers bitten off

Q: What did the casual mathematician discover at the end of his vivid rainbow of dreams (Question mark- key`s screwed) A: Enough dirt to fill 3141592+ treasure chests to the brim.

How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?.....Why the **** do you care?

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Chuck Norris. Alright come in.

dfghfgdfhfdhfgdfghdfh

antijokes

A recently engaged couple are having sex. The man finishes in just under 3 minutes as usual. The woman then says "I love you" because they've been together for over 2 years and they care for each other very deeply.

Knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock, Who's there? Woodpecker. Woodpecker who? Woodpecker.

Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner fudge is made. This market has a very dynamic and fresh selection.

how does a zookeeper build a snowman. same as everyone else

Why Can't Asian women drive? a: Cause they are chink assholes who have only peripheral vision

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

A dog walks into a bar and falls on his butt beacause dogs cant walk.

The man who ran behind the bus got exhausted. The man who ran in front of the bus got tired. The first one survived.

When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

What's worse than 10 dead babies in a dumpster? One dead baby in 10 dumpsters.

A guy walks into a bar with a sad and depressed look on his face. the bartender says why the long face. The depressed guys think "how bad of eye sight he has my face is the average diameter of about 20 cm long"

If you say gullible over and over again, it sounds like stupidity.

How do you estimate the number of jippos in an area? Take the dole's numbers from that area and measure how far away they are from the nearest council landfill site.

A black guy walks up to a drug dealer. He asked the drug dealer for directions and went on with his life.

Why can't Stevie Wonder drive? There is no steering wheel at the back of the bus.

How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

You're momma's so fat, that I just wanna go over there and make hot passionate love to her. What? I'm a chubby chaser.

Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...