What did Mambo say to Jumbo? Nothing. Because they weren't friends.

"Knock, Knock" "Go away, I have a lot of stuff to do right now and knock knock jokes suck."

Where does a leper go every Monday and Wednesday? The dermatologist.

Why doesn't stevie wonder play snooker? Because it's not very popular in the US.

How do you realize your life is over? You don't, but the coroner does.

What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

A polish, english and african man each were standing on a skyscraper. The african man jumped and died. The polish and enlgish men called 999.

Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because Jimmy has no legs. Why doesn't he have any legs? Because he's a potato.

"hey those pancakes look pretty good." "thats a cat steve."

Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

If you say gullible over and over again, it sounds like stupidity.

What do you call a cat with no legs and an inverted anus? Nothing, you're to horrified to speak.

what is black, white, and red all over? A bloody panda

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

People talk about how there grandparents was in the holocaust well my grandpa was to he died. How he fell off the guard tower.

Hey, want to hear a joke? Women's Rights

What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

Why did the woman drop her baby? she had a stroke.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair because he had cancer

Two drums and a cymbal fall down a cliff. Ba-dum pssh.

Why was the blond looking at the orange juice box? Because she was reading the nutritional content of orange juice.

Why did little susie fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock who's there? not susie

Why did the chicken cross the road? Loss of habitat.

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? a boyscout comes back from camp.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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