Why was the woman poor at driving? Because she had not yet passed her driving test.

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guess what Beethoven is doing right now. de-composing

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A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

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You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

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A dyslexic pimp buys a warehouse.

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Q. WHAT IS SPECIAL ABOUT GEORGE BUSH? A. NOTHING

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A cat fell out of a really tall tree. It didn't land on its feet.

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An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

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Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

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why didnt the dog bark? he died in his sleep

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What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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Do you know that car over there? No.

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whats worse than a worm in a rotten apple? 2 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 2 worms in a rotten apple? 3 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 3 worms in a rotten apple? the haulocaust. whats worse than the haulocaust? 4 worms in a rotten apple. wait wait...that was rascist,nevermind this joke.

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what do you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientest? a mutant chicken

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How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

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How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

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Women's Basketball.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

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Human is to breast as breast is to nipple as nipple is to milk as milk is to HIV as HIV is to AIDS as AIDS is to death as death is to heaven or hell as heaven or hell is to Jesus or the Devil as Jesus is to God as God is to the Universe

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Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a chicken

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Whats worse than HIV? AIDS

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While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

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a boy walks in a house and mother says hi who are you and the boy says does it really matter whad really maters is wht you will do about your dead son

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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