so he says "aaahhh". then i threw a fridge at him

How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

How can you tell if a woman is dead? She has no pulse.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

*Hands women baby* Women: Hes so beatiful! I'm going to love him forever! Doctor: Its not yours, yours died.

What does AIDS stand for? Acquired immune deficiency syndrome

What did the pig say to the banana? Oink.

69

A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

Why do women where make-up and perfume? because they are ugly and they smell bad.

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence

Why was the truck covered in blood? The chicken tried crossing the road

How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

A man walked into a haunted house and screamed. He had stepped on a nail.

Why didnt the kid go in the pool? Because there was no pool!!

Yo mama so fat she died

A man walks into a bar. End of story.

Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

what do you get when you mix a bever and a racoon? A bevecoon!

Ask me if I'm in a tree? No.

A hot girl walks past a boy and the boy turns around and watches her pass. The girl sees the boy staring and asks with a slight attitude, "What are you looking at?", to which the boy replied, "Well, I noticed you walking towards me and I couldn't help but think 'Hmm..she looks familiar. Have I seen her at school? No. Work? No. Somewhere else? Perhaps.' I then concluded that I've never seen you before and then you turned around and asked me what I was looking at. What are YOU looking at?"

the blonde choked o a gummy bear. What happened next? she went to the hospital

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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