Why did the plumber kill his family? He wasn't a very good plumber.

i had a bowl of soup and it was 5 inches in diameter and 3 inches tall. how much soup did i eat? very little because i drank most of it

A: Ask me if I'm a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

What is the diffrence between a strait guy and a gay guy? The strait guy gets into heaven.

How long does it take for a Jew to die being gased. Same as anyone else.

Q, Where did Rebecca Black go to eat? A. TGI Fridays

What do you call a girl with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

Q: Why did the Jew have to go to the Holocaust A: Because he was Jewish

Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? Because they were part of his uniform.

What"s the biggest Jenga game? 9/11

Why did the chicken cross the road? For a completely legit reason dumbass

If 25 cows walk in to the grocery store, what do you have? A scared manager. MOO!

Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Rape.

What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

Why did the man with no arms and legs fall out of the tree? Gravity.

Q: Why did the young boy run away from girls and screamed that they had cooties? A: That's what little boys do. He also has an abusive home life

Violets are red Roses are blue I scrrewed that up Now can i screw you?

Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

A semi-coherent black man was wandering down the street toward an open garbage receptacle. Immediately an angry, filthy raccoon jumped up, hissing and baring its fangs, as if to defend its territory against the startled negro. This happened four times in a row. Each time it was either a negro, a mexican, a crippled kid or a person of jewish ancestry. Each time the raccoon hissed viciously. Coincidence? No. The raccoon was obviously very hungry and attempting to defend its last remaining refuge of territory from the ever-increasing encroachment of man's filth into the formerly natural and pristine spaces where wildlife once lived. He is now reduced to hissing at the ethnics and the cripples, just to eek out a pitiful subsistence on trash.

Why couldn't the college student get on the internet? He can't afford a computer.

Your brother is so ugly that sometimes he gets teased at schools and comes home crying.

Games stop telling me to press any key to continue. That key doesn't exist.

Roses are red. Voilets are blue I'm Morgan Freeman and I CAN SMELL YOU...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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