Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q. What's brown and people don't care when they step on it? A. Dirt

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call an elderly women who after the death of her late husband had many enconters witb men? A whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock Knock Who's There Ur Mom Ur Mom Who Ur Mom is Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you get a baby out of a blender? Call the police and have them deal with the tragedy.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What happened to the jew? He got shoved in an oven.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Yeah, totally.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Who flexes triceps more than anyone? James

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How did the ruttabaga believe itself to be a ruttabaga? Because it was in fact NOT a ruttabaga, but some self-aware individual with delusions.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Tim's gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How are a plum and a rabbit alike? Theyre both purple except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Justin Littleton getting laid.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

You know what helps with sholder pain? If you lick my butthole.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: Ask me if I'm a tree. A: No, I am not a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

3 blonds walk into a bar ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +18

penis that is all

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what do a plum and a rabbit have in common? there both purple except for the rabbit

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Little Timmy walked up to the teacher and asked her "Can i go to the restroom?" The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you ?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an orgy.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you make a professional wrestler cry? You could stab him repeatedly with a box cutter and demand his social security number, but I wouldn't suggest it. He would most likely beat you up.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

what do a midget and a dwarf have in common? they both die by the age of 25 due to genetic failures.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops