An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "How did you lose your arm?" The amputee doesn't respond because he has been deaf and mute since birth.

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Why are girls large and round? Because they are raised by wild packs of oompa loompas.

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Why did the lady spill her coffee? The waiter accidently ran into her and then apologized.

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Q: My mom's getting really old and It's starting to get hard to shop for her. Any ideas? A: You should get her a coffin.

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Q. What do you call a black priest? A. Holy Shit

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There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

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Why do mexicans jump the gate Because theres a sale at chipotle

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What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

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How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

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When geese fly, they often fly in a V-formation. Why is one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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haha.

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What's the difference between me and you? Dr. Dre

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's black.

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What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

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when do you go to heaven? Never, it doesn't exist.

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What did Bill go for his birthday? No where someone slashed his tires.

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Hey, want to hear a joke? Women's Rights

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What is pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

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What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

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Adam Sandler.

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Q. What is brown and sticky? A. Creosote.

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what's the difference between a lamborghini and you're mother. cars don't scream when you rape them

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Why did jack fall down the hill ? Because Jill pushed him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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