What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

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How do you kill a blue elephant, with a blue elephant gun, how do you kill a pink elephant, you strangle it until it turns blue and shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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What happened to the dying kangaroo? He died What animal is not in the lion king? Kangaroo --why? Because he died...

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There once was a man from Peru Whose limericks stopped at line two (I sense the public demanding an encore) There once was a man from Verdun There's also a limerick about Emperor Nero, but I can't tell it to you.

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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

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Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Do you know any good bird jokes? Well this is hawkward...

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A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

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Baby seal walks into a club... what a tragedy

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His motives so far are unknown as he is a chicken, and therefor cannot divulge the information.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

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why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

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A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

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Why did the person play his XBOX 360? because he felt like it.

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How do you kill a down-syndrome kid? fire.

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What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

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What's the similarity between a grape and an elephant? Both are purple except for the elephant.

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A piece of rope walks into a bar, and asks for a beer. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve ropes here." The rope goes into the bathroom, ties himself into a knot, then rubs himself against the walls until his ends are ragged. Then he walks out and says to the bartender: "I'm a frayed knot." The bartender replies, "Right, I see that you've tied yourself into a knot and frayed your ends. So what? What are you trying to prove?" "Well, I...I mean, it was supposed to be a pun, and you were supposed to react like...like it was..." "Look, I thought I was doing you something nice by letting you use the restroom, even though I told you we don't serve ropes here. And then you go in there and rub yourself against the walls or some crazy shit, and probably get them all dirty, and you come out and expect I'm going to give you a drink because of a pun? Is that how you think this works? Get out of my bar before I call the police." The rope slinks out, still tied in a knot, and eventually finds somebody willing to buy a bottle of cheap vodka for him at a liquor store. He never sets foot in the bar again.

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From SpongeBob SquarePants "Hey Patrick, wanna know what's funnier than 24??" - SpongeBob "What?" - Patrick " 25!!!!" - SpongeBob There are a lot of things that are funnier than 24 though.

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A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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Why was the orphan crying? His parents were dead and his future was uncertain.

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What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? N*ggers.

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Hitler was a pretty good guy I guess

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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