Roses are red, Violets are blue, WTF is this, i gotta take a piss.

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? The man's loving family had recently been murdered, and the clock was a constant reminder of their mortality, as it had served as the center of those horrific events.

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Why did the bird fall? It was an ostrich

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Two men walked into a bar, the third followed close behind.

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Q:how do you brighten up a room? A:you turn on the lamps

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask them politely to turn down their volume.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is large.

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How do you get a dead baby out of a blender? Doritos.

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The horse said "nay."

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Roses are green Violets are green I'm colour blind Everything is green

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What did the man with leprosy say to the prostitute? Keep the tip

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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So anyways, can I have the last comment or not?

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He saw and ice cream truck across the street and rode towards it as fast as he could, sadly it was rush hour and he was hit by a speeding ambulance because he forgot to look both ways.

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I remember my first "I remember my first-" joke

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why are their no mexicans in hell they all jumped the border

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Why didn't the boy eat peanut butter? He had Arachibutyrophobia.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I was eating an orange in the park last week when I saw four men brutally murdered before my very eyes.

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who farted? umm........that guy.

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Roses are blue, Violets are green, I am color blind, You have cancer.

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Why did the 1,000 pound woman start crying? Because her son got hit by a car.

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Quit repeating the damn jokes you jackasses it ruins the laughter. Like if you agree.

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a guy is driving home his wife calls him and she say's be careful there is a lunatic driving on the wrong side of the road towards traffic he then reply saying they all are

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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