yo mama is so fat, she should seriously consider gastric bypass surgery, morbid obesity is extremely detrimental to one's health

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The little mouse lifted the giant Elephant up so the Elephant could reach the bag of snacks, but then the Elephant said: I cant reach it, you must be tired so lets switch places... Squish: Squish! Elephant: Mouse! Where are you! *looks at "squish" NO! THIS WAS NOT THE WAY THE JOKE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!!!! Moral: Elephants cant talk...

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What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

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When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

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Why was the boy un-able to talk He was retarded

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How do you wake Lady Gaga up? Poker face

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what's funnier than the holocaust? 2 holocausts and 9/11

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KEVIN HART

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Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Perpresher

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what do you call a diver with no arms and no legs? a bobber

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What do you call a man with three arms and three legs and no nose. A highly unlikely instance that no one would believe is real.

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whats better than shoes feet

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what do you call a kid with no arms and legs under a bus an ambulance, he's obviously in pain

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red Fences are red OMG MY FENCE IS ON FIRE!

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Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

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One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

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What did Gene give Carla for Christmas? AIDS

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What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

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whats the difference between santa claus and jewish people santa claus goes down the chimney and jewish people go up

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Womens Rights.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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