Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

I'm not wearing any underwear. Why? Because I am have built in underwear. ;)

Why did the blind man drown? Because he couldn't swim.

whats pink and fluffy pink fluff

How many Aodhan's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Aodhan's da has already screwed all the lightbulbs...

Whats black, white, and read all over? Micheal Jackson reading a book while painting himself red.

Listen I know you're a cat and I'm a cat but I know we can be friends

Me: do u you want to here a joke You: ya Me: Woman's rights

How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

"And i look to myself what the hell happened to our world..."

N e one else find the girl in the cellar from the new evil dead creepy ? Like shes some real demon being used by the movie industry to scare people? (serious qestion)

What's your middle name? (Interrupt them) It doesn't matter what your middle name is! What does deduce mean? Fall down the stairs.

okay.....

What do you call a girl with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

Three guys walk into a club, one is a fat ugly chode face bastard, the second one is a 4 foot 2 cricket champion and the third is a handsome young man.

roses are red violets are red everything's red i'm colour blind

How did Notre Dame football stay so popular in spite of decades of mediocrity? Catholicism.

DON'T expect the unexpected, you don't want to KILL the unexpected ;-)

What did the dog say to the other dog? Your breath smells like onions.

you are gay

What is brown and sticky?

Roses are red Vilots are blue God made people pretty What the happend to you

How do you get a dead baby out of a blender? Doritos.

How do racist jokes start? Generally with a racially insensitive stereotype.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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