How many jews can you get in a car? 5, if you don't want any cops after you. The answer can also be 2,6,7,8,9. It's from car to car.

Q: Why happened to the dead whale? A: It was shot by Asian pochures.

Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

Why was the little boy crying? His whole family died.

What happens if Pinoccio says my nose is about to grow?

I am a real homosexual

What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree and lands on you, you'd die? A pool table.

How can you tell if your wife is dead? She no longer has a pulse.

On the last day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... A letter saying she had gone bankrupt, as she had spent all her money buying me 12 pear trees, 35 golden rings, hiring maids and pipers and etc. for over 100 hours, and an innumerable amount of animals.

How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

Knock Knock. Come in. -mattobrado

Q; Why does paint dry? A; Because plankton are single cell organisms

Why can't Tommy the T-Rex clap? Because dinosaurs have been extinct for 65 Million years.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn't have woman's rights Knock knock Who's there? NOT Sally, she's in the kitchen

George W. Bush

Q: What faster than a black man with a t.v A: A jew with a coupon

Whats worst then the Holocaust? Two holocaust's.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

What's the difference between a single mom and a stripper? Job status.

What did the blue man say to the purple lady? Do you want to make purple.

*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Cause 7 is black.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...