What was the hardest part about the orphanage burning down? My cock.

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Giving birth to the antichrist

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What did the white guy the black guy and the Asian all have in common Penises

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What does D.N.A. stand for? Deoxyribonucleic Acid

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yo mama's so sexy... wait, thats not how it goes

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Two friends not to far apart: A: Hey you, you hear me?! B: yes. A: You hear me?! B: yes!! A: You hear me?! B: yes, yes, what!?! A: You hear me?! B: YEEEEEEEES WHAT'S going on?!?! (gets upset) A: Nothing, I'm just checking your hearing.

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What do you call someone who states the obvious? Someone who states the obvious.

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Why doesn't the chicken wear pants? Beacuse its pecker is on its face.

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Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

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What's funnier than a midget bungie jumping? Nothing

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Why did the rhino cross the rode? Because it was the chickens day off.

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Have you ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Well it's really nice.

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A woman refuses to make a sandwich and walks away unharmed.

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What do homeless people get for Christmas? Nothing, they are homeless.

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#FEARtheFLAMINGOS

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Why does Jerry sandusky like little boys? Because each and every intellectual human being have different interests

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. I'm calling the police.

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did you know Helen Keller had a dog? neither did she.

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How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

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What's the most wonderful time of the year? When your wife dies.

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What happened to the man who was hit by a car? He was immediately rushed to a hospital and was reported to have a broken femur dislocated shoulder and several broken ribs. The driver was later found and was declared driving under the influence of alcoholic beverages and the victim's family sued the driver for the medical costs. The driver was arrested and was sent to a detention center for 3 months and the victim made a complete recovery.

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

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What do you say to a blind buss driver? You suck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops