roses are red violets are blue ill cut your dick off and use it as glue

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I have read the Terms of Service.

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Your mother is so fat that unfortunately she can not fit into her picture for her passport and is not allowed to leave the country to go visit her dying mother.

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Penis

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why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a women

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I am really good at math debating

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Knock, knock. Who's there? A black Russian.

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69

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Why do they call you the interrup... SHUT UP!

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Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

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Excuses are like butt holes...they are round

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yesterday i saw a man walking down the street with no legs. just kidding.

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How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

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Roses are red violets are next thing you know my D*** is in you

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What color is my lamp? Brown

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lololololololololol

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So dont touch it

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What's red and green? A frog in a blender

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What's yellow and smells like piss? Urine.

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Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

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Dan O'Driscoll

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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a priest and a jewish guy walk into a bar. they both drink as expected and go home to their families

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Hitler is my role model

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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